BIBI LUCILLE Interview: being a woman

SøEdited Team:
SøCreative Director: Chris Saint Sims 
​SøFashion Director: Savannah Barthorpe​​​​​

​Sø•Interview: Savannah Barthorpe

SoEdited spoke with actor and writer Bibi Lucille regarding the difficulties of being a woman, but also the empowering future we can rejoice in from personal trauma we all suffer. During an exciting period where Bibi has flourished in theater and TV, and more recently casting her creative net wider into writing, her future is one of commitment to growth. Not only in her career, but in her personal life.

Why do women need to break away from perfect role models and find imperfect models?

It is entirely up to the individual who they want their role models to be, but I do love this shift we’re seeing in the media - the way women have been represented for decades has been centred around a perfect, flawless form of a woman, whereas now we’re seeing a lot more praise for many different types of women. Growing up, I was completely obsessed with physical perfection - as I think a lot of young girls are.

The media forces a narrative on us that beauty is our greatest asset and the tool that will open most doors. Beauty remains a strong currency, but there’s been a real shift in seeing women who don’t embody physical perfection coming into the spotlight. When I started watching films like Bridesmaids or series like Fleabag and I May Destroy You, it all finally started to click - I was allowed to be messy, imperfect, and flawed. That’s the very thing that made me interesting, that made a person fascinating to watch.

​Worshipping beauty becomes empty, whereas finding work that makes you laugh or cry or feel hope is so much more fulfilling. Finding an “imperfect” role model is what will set you free in your art or creative field. It allows you to stop fearing imperfection and gives you the confidence that flaws are what make a person endlessly fascinating
and relatable.
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​How rejection and guilt can be used to empower women and girls.
Guilt is something women seem to be born with, and rejection is something no human can escape. Guilt is a horrible, fascinating feeling that can completely consume us. I think because women are born with such a deep sense of empathy - and growing up, we are always pushed into caregiver roles - it’s something that
follows us well into adulthood.

With regard to guilt, as it’s not something that can easily be pushed away, we can attempt to turn it into something useful and good. We can recognise the emotion and attempt to analyse it objectively. What exactly am I feeling guilty about? Would you blame another person in the way you are blaming yourself? Is the guilt productive, or is it only serving as mental torture? We have to analyse our emotions and understand whether we are being too harsh on ourselves.

​Difficult decisions have to be made in life and collateral damage is sometimes inevitable - plus, mistakes happen. More often than not, none of it
is your fault.

Rejection is also a large, inevitable part of life. And rejection is truly a wonderful thing. Certainty is the enemy of a good, exciting life - if you were handed everything you ever asked for, what would be your purpose? Where’s the excitement in always being accepted, not having to work for anything? Working towards something and reaching for a goal is what makes life worth living - it gives us a purpose and always
brings adventure. Without rejection, we would be miserable. It builds our resilience, so when we finally get that “yes,” we’re elated. Something I always think is, what if I’m ten “no’s” away from a “yes”?
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​How Self-compassion is empowering as it embraces our childhood self.
It can be hard to love yourself in this day and age. We are constantly bombarded with images of perfection, success, and beauty. The entire commercial industry feeds on our feelings of inadequacy. It’s
hard, but it’s possible to reverse the damaging effect it has had on us.

​The tactic is similar to CBT - every
time you feel that negative thought creeping in, you stop it. Observe it, and turn it on its head. Know that
these thoughts are not yours - they are intrusive and caused by the bombardment of perfection in the media.
Change that thought into a positive one. It’s almost like gentle parenting yourself.

​The way that this embraces your childhood self is that it looks after that inner child. You’re cultivating your
mind as though it’s a child again - reinforcing positive thoughts in that impressionable, young brain. It brings
it back to the basics - looking after that younger version of you and knowing that every negative thought you
have impacts that inner child. So, decide how you treat it.

​How the song “To be damned?” is a call for redemption and freedom from guilt.
The song truly is a testament to redemption - the fear that we may have messed things up in our path or taken a wrong turn - and whether we can ever be redeemed for it. And it could be anything; a career choice, a relationship choice. Or maybe something you said to someone that plays over and over in your head - feeding into that unshakeable feeling of guilt. The verses convey all of this through questions like “Will I be damned?” and the image of possessing a “filthy mouth and a soul to match.” The chorus repeats the line “I’m done,” which conveys the sheer exhaustion we feel from constantly questioning ourselves. The yearning to stop our minds from overthinking and replaying every conversation we’ve ever had. It’s about knowing that
redemption is right around the corner when you can fully move on from the guilt.


Why reckoning with the darker parts of yourself aims to find meaning in the chaos.
As I mentioned before, our flaws are what truly make us interesting. The darker parts of ourselves - the parts we can’t fully face - are what make us three-dimensional, fascinating people. These are always the qualities I love to watch on screen; a priest with a morally dubious past, a florist with a dark past… these character flaws are what we can truly look at to find meaning in the chaos. That search for redemption is what gives us purpose and pushes us on a better path; it’s what makes our journey so interesting.

How imperfect role models inspire women to spot confidence-destroying perfectionism.
“Imperfect” role models are so important to the media and for the women consuming it. The range of women and female characters now portrayed on TV and film provides representation and allows many more women to recognise parts of themselves in these people. It allows us to be okay with making mistakes and being completely human - it allows for better art. We no longer have to uphold some strange physical
standard that prevents us from creating good, real work.


What are your upcoming goals and aspirations?
I have lots of goals and aspirations for the coming year. I’m pursuing lots of different creative avenues; mainly acting, writing, music, and design. In terms of acting and writing, the two have been going hand in hand. I want to keep pushing for new projects that I have a lot of faith in - and aiming to collaborate with more wonderful people. I’m aiming to have completed seven songs this year that all fall under one album
(and hopefully start gigging when I can kick the nerves). Finally, I will be releasing a line of couture dresses this spring, the brand being called B.LUCILLE.

Do you have a preferred style of acting or genre of music?
I love all styles of acting - I’ve enjoyed performances from comedy to horror. A particular favourite right now is Hamish Linklater as Monsignor Paul Hill in Midnight Mass. I watched it months ago, and I’m still not over it. My music taste ranges all the time - I’ll listen to classical music whilst working and then rap whilst working out. There’s no in-between. The sort of music that I really appreciate and truly love is blues and jazz.
The upbeat, swing stuff is what I’m really into - Otis Redding, the Dirty Rotten Vipers… also the entire soundtrack from Princess and the Frog.

How would you describe the emotions you experience just before stepping on stage?
What do you love most about acting and music?
I honestly find the nerves torturous before stepping on stage. It’s so painful, and it’s the only moment I really doubt what I’m doing. I always think about how easy it would be to just be the audience member - to sit and relax. But the second I’m in the swing of things on stage, I remember all over again why I love it so much. Making an audience laugh, especially, is a feeling unlike anything. Theatre definitely feels like home,
and I’m so grateful I’ve been able to be a part of the industry, even if only in brief bursts. I haven’t done a live gig since I was fourteen, so I’m definitely terrified to return to live music. But I know it’ll be worth it.